When I was a lad in the 70s and started bartending, there was a grumpy old guy who came into the bar every day to sip on a Calvert and water, no ice, and smoke some Camels. The bar owner and senior bartenders told me to listen up if he ever gave any advice about the business, as the old guy had spent his work life in Manhattan, working at venues like 21 and the Algonquin. One day, he grunted “Lemme tell ya how to make a Martini.”

Back in the 70s, and through the 80s the funny, cool shit to do was to try to find the way to the driest Martini, so I would do things like use an atomiser, or write “vermouth” in small letters on the bev-nap, or call the guy at the bar on the house phone and whisper “vermouth” into the glass via the phone. Clever, fun, and ultimately the wrong idea. The old guy was right when he said that the Martini is a crafted recipe, and vermouth is an important ingredient. “Any dumbfuck can chill a glass of vodka, but a Martini needs to be well made. Use plenty of vermouth.” I have to agree with everything he told me; I’ve been making his “New York Martini” for over 30 years in places from Beijing to LA to New York to Glasgow to Prague to Istanbul and many points in between, and everywhere I have made it people have said, “This is the best Martini I have ever had.” I owe it to that old dude and that particular afternoon.

I diverge from your point regarding metal vs glass because I believe that one’s hand draws the cold more easily from the metal than from a chilled mixing glass. Meh. Big woop. Stir it. And though I have been curmudgeonly proselytising for years– especially in the 90s– I do say that cocktails are good, and I am happy to make something that is enjoyed, (and reordered especially) no matter what is in it. It IS a business, after all. Just don’t call it a “martini.”

As to shaking a Martini. If you want to, well, knock yourself out.

Processes which can affect flavor with shaking include: Induction of more dissolved gasses (from the air) into the mix. Emulsion of the oils in the water. Out gassing of volatile oil flavoring components.

All of these can change the mouth “feel”, and the perceived flavor.

As to whether bar “towels” are bar “rags”. . . I think that is best left to observation, and opinion of the observer.

K.

4) Sell vermouth and try a dash of bitters- guide your customer’s taste to sophistication.

What dilutes a martini is adding too little ice to the shaker…

The shaker should be filled to the brim with good quality large cubes…not crappy, watery, melty little shards…

I also prefer a gin martini.
I often confuse bartenders when asking for a “wet” martini…and it usually results in their fucking it up.

Also just as adding an onion turns a “martini” into a “gibson” I think the bartenders of the world should unite and decide that a “dry vodka martini” is just a cold glass of vodka . . . and not a martini at all.

My $0.02.

OK, bad joke. But many discussions with my work buddies eventually drift to the martini (I work for goverment, we drink a lot). While I prefer my martini at about 5 to 1 with a top-shelf gin, every single one of my work buddies insists that the Martini Fad has been around since the end of prohibition and that the Sour-Apple martini has been around since forever.

Maybe we can get an Act of Congress or a Presidential Decree reclaiming the Martini as a specific recipe and not as a catagory of other drinks and glasses.

The term ‘bruise the gin’ came about as a sort of joke. Amatuer bartenders will shake the living daylights out of everything in sight, and rather than launch into a long explanation involving liquor, water, ice and ice fragments, the client would simply state that ‘you’ll bruise the gin’.

This worked pretty well until Hollywood came along with James Bond and specified ’shaken, not stirred’. I object with the old standard about bruises and gin.

You’re quite right about the vermouth. Few people know that good vermouth has a nice flavor to it. The trouble is that the MD 20-20 that passes for vermouth in most bars does nothing to compliment the rocket fuel that passes for gin. Order top shelf or nothing, I say.