Jeffrey Morgenthaler

Those who know me well are aware that I’ve been going on about this for years, but for some reason I’ve only just now remembered that I have my own website and can carry on the effort here.

Folks, there are a few drinking holidays here in the United States, but I’m here to tell you that none of them are as important as the new celebration I’m proposing for this great country of ours.  Allow me to start from the beginning:

Saint Patrick’s Day
Saint Patrick’s Day (March 17th), a national holiday in Ireland, is a feast day that commemorates Saint Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland.  It was brought to the United States by Irish immigrants and is now celebrated by Irish and non-Irish alike.  Cities with large Irish populations host huge celebrations with parades, where scores of drunken fraternities swallow huge amounts of Guinness Stout, Jameson Irish Whiskey, Bailey’s Irish Cream, and Mickey’s Malt Liquor. Sometimes corned beef is eaten.

Cinco de Mayo
Cinco de Mayo (May 5th) is a Mexican holiday that celebrates the the victory of Mexican troops over the French occupational army in the Battle of Puebla on May 5th, 1862.  It has been adopted as a commercialized drinking holiday by the United States, where people flock to chain Mexican restaurants to gulp down huge quantities blended margaritas, shots of Jose Cuervo tequila and bottles of Corona beer. Chips and salsa are served.

Halloween
Halloween (October 31st) began as a Celtic Pagan festival, named as the evening (e’en) before All Hallow’s Day on November 1st.  Halloween wasn’t widely celebrated in the United States until the middle of the 20th century, and is now the sixth most profitable holiday for retailers.  It is celebrated by this country’s drinking-age population in the form of dressing up in very slutty costumes and consuming large amounts of alcohol. Any kind. Dry ice is often involved.

Repeal Day
Repeal Day (December 5th) is not celebrated by anyone in this country, yet it is the only day which truly has any connection with alcohol. December 5th is the anniversary of the day the United States repealed the Eighteenth Amendment and gave us all the constitutional right to consume alcohol.  I’ve been celebrating Repeal Day for years by forcing this information down the throats of my customers, and now I’m forcing it on you.  Here are a few reasons why I think Repeal Day should be a major drinking holiday in the United States:

1. We have the constitutional right to do so.  How many forms of pleasure are guaranteed by the Constitution?  None, unless you’re one of those who get an inflated sense of ego from holding a firearm or speaking in public. Me, I’m going to stick with alcohol.
2. It’s at the right time.  Conveniently located about halfway between Thanksgiving and Christmas, at a time when we’re probably not with our families, the Fifth of December represents a great time to get together with friends and celebrate our constitutional rights.
3. Repeal Day doesn’t exclude.  Are you an American, or are you located in the United States? Congratulations, you’re invited to join our party!  Sorry, gay leprechauns, but Saint Patrick’s Day is off limits.  Being French on Cinco de Mayo is about as cool as being British on the Fourth of July.  But December Fifth is a day that’s open to anyone!
4. It’s easy!  There are no outfits to buy, costumes to rent, rivers to dye green.  Simply celebrate the day by stopping by your local bar, tavern, saloon, winery, distillery, or brewhouse and having a drink.  Pick up a six-pack on your way home from work.  Split a bottle of wine with a loved one.  Buy a shot for a stranger.  Just do it because you can.

Thanks for reading about what I hope will become a more widely-celebrated day in this country. Please help spread the word about Repeal Day, and tell a friend. Cheers!

Okay, it doesn’t sound so great when you scream it like that, but…

The Eugene Weekly’s Best of Eugene poll came out, and I’ve tied with my good friend Jeremy Shank for the second-best bartender in Eugene.

You can read the full story here. Scroll down about halfway to see my little name in there.

Oh, and the Richmond Gimlet won third-best drink in Eugene! Huzzah!

Hey Bartender

As a novice bartender I find that martini etiquette can be quite confusing, perhaps because the traditional martini and the present-day fad are different. I understand not shaking clear martinis, and I also do not add vermouth to vodka. I suppose I would like to hear your take on what to shake, and how to interpret customers. Also, do you shake Manhattans or stir them? From your article I was not sure of your take on them…

Thanks,
Hillary

Hey Hillary

The rule is that clear drinks should never be shaken – the thinking here is that since a clear drink is made from such delicate ingredients (traditionally aromatic liquors such as gins, fortified wines such as vermouths, aromatic bitters, etc.), the additional water that comes from shaking a drink would be an unwelcome component. And that definitely goes for the Manhattan as well.

I’m sure you know that using a chilled glass is going to keep the drink colder for longer (there’s nothing quite like pouring a cold drink in a warm glass), but the choice of container you use to mix the drink is just as important. Make sure to use a metal cocktail shaker rather than a glass, as metal is a better conductor of heat than glass is, and therefore draws heats from its surface and chills your drink better. Silver will get a drink colder than stainless steel will, and glass just acts as an insulator. The bummer is that silver shakers are difficult to come by these days.

As an aside, please note that it’s not possible to “bruise” gin. This is just a bullshit myth perpetuated by Martini “connoisseurs” who want to impress you with their “knowledge” and “sophistication”. It’s a meaningless term, trust me. However, they’re right about not shaking a martini – they just don’t get why.

As far as proportions are concerned, I personally love the flavor of vermouth. I know that’s not really a popular sentiment these days, but I’ve found that most martini drinkers have confused a hatred of vermouth for sophistication. Vermouth is a wonderful thing (sweet vermouth: oh-my-god), especially when we’re talking about high-quality vermouths. I tend to make my Martinis with less vermouth than I do my Manhattans: 4-to-1 gin to vermouth for a Martini, and 3-to-1 vermouth to bourbon/rye for a Manhattan.

It is impossible to guess a customer’s preference for gin versus vodka, vermouth versus none, bitters versus none, etc., so I recommend asking what your customer wants in their cocktail to ensure you give them the exact drink they’re looking for.

Even if it is a shaken vodka “martini” with no vermouth.

Art of the Drink (no relation to the previous post) has a great little class on how to present wine in a bar or restaurant setting. This is a great video to watch for service industry people and restaurant-goers alike, as he covers some key points – my favorite being this: it is not okay to reject the wine simply because you don’t like it. Yes, once you’ve okayed the bottle and the server has opened it, that wine is yours unless it’s gone bad in the bottle. It shocks me how many servers and customers don’t realize this.

Click the big button to watch the video:

You all know how I feel about vodka martinis, if you’ve read this blog for any length of time. Well, Darcy over at The Art of Drink put it better than I ever could:

People seem to fear the vermouth, when in reality vermouth is your friend. It is the vermouth that adds the flavour to a martini and not the vodka. But the “monkey see, monkey do” principal applies. Ordering a plain old martini was boring, so it became a dry martini, which sounded better and made the purchaser look more “in the know.” Then the extra dry vodka martini became all the rage because it seemed sophisticated. The reality is that if you give an alcoholic a bottle of vodka and jar of olives this is about the same level of sophistication.

Read the full story here.

The luck of some people. I suppose congratulations are in order, but wow!

“I’ve been waiting on him for about three years,” Kienow said. “We’d just talk across the bar he’s a really nice guy. I hope he comes back in so I can tell him thank you, because the other day I was kind of dumbfounded.”

Read the full story here.

The Mr. and Mrs. Jones Juicer Set by Polly George would be a fine addition to your Adamms Family-inspired bar. Simply cut your fruit in half, and ream on the lifelike small head and torso that protrudes from the bowl. The copy doesn’t mention how to get the juice from the bowl, or how easily a head might become lodged in a lemon as you wrest it from its tiny torso, but if you’re looking to do a lot of work and maximize your creepiness at this year’s Halloween party, this might be the best hundred you’d dropped in a while.

Mr. and Mrs. Jones Juicer Set, $90 at Velocity

Fun bar blog Make Money Bartending has this post giving advice to people looking to get started in the bar biz. And I quote:

It’s much easier to get a job as a busser than it is as a bartender, this is obvious. A busser’s job is an entry level position where a bartender’s job is generally not.

Something to remember is, there are a lot of bars out there that only hire bussers, while recruiting all bartenders within.

With that said, if you’re wanting to bartend it’s not a bad idea to look at those kinds of places for work. Getting a job as busser, with the intention and ambition to work your way up to bartending is an excellent strategy.

Read the article here.