“Here, see if you can make me something with this”, the liquor rep taunted as he dropped a bottle of aquavit on the bar. If there’s one thing you should know about me, it’s that I don’t really work that well under pressure. I try, but it literally takes me weeks to come up with a new drink that I’m happy with. Maybe I’m slow, maybe I’m a perfectionist, doesn’t matter: I hate it when I have to work under pressure.
So I was especially vexed when this particular wiseass handed me a bottle of aquavit. For those of you who don’t know, is a traditional Scandinavian liquor flavored with caraway and - typically - other herbs such as fennel and anise. It’s delicious, but it’s unique and isn’t known for its superb mixability.
However, I knew the liquor boob was insinuating that I might not be able to rise to the challenge, so I whipped this up (after about three false starts). A small handful of visitors to the bar at Clyde Common have suggested that it might be one of the best drinks I’ve come up with so far, but I’ll let you be the judge of that. I just think it tastes delicious.
1 oz aquavit
1 oz applejack
¾ oz sweet vermouth
¼ oz yellow Chartreuse
1 dash Angostura bitters
Stir ingredients with ice and strain into a chilled cocktail coupe. Garnish with a large twist of lemon peel and serve.
My problem with homemade tonic water has always been a flavor profile that was too esoteric for the general audience. This recipe takes some of the positive qualities people have come to understand from commercial tonic water and updated them with fresh ingredients.
One question I'm often asked is "Do you have any drink-related book recommendations?" Well, funny you should ask, I've compiled a list of the ten books every professional bartender or home mixologist should own. I keep every one of these close at hand and have read most of them several times. I suggest you do the same.
The problem with living in Oregon is the absence of little wooden shacks by the sea that sell cases of fresh ginger beer stacked on back porches. But with some readily-available ingredients, a recipe I've been revising for several years - and a few free minutes - I can easily transport myself to a little fishing boat on the ocean as I sip a Dark and Stormy made with fresh, house-made ginger beer.
It's always mojito season somewhere, so this advice is timely in your area about half the year. Wether you're making them or simply enjoying them, this advice will help you look like a pro in no time at all.
The flavors of the Richmond Gimlet are imbued with sunshine. Fresh mint mingling with the herbaceousness of gin and the tartness of lime have made this drink a Eugene classic for many years now.
You'll get a lot of snarky advice on this site about how to make a proper drink, but if you ever need to know what not to do, this is the video for you.
Not to be confused with the Spanish wine-and-fruit-based alcoholic beverage sangria, sangrita (meaning "little blood") is a traditional accompaniment to a tequila served completo; a non-alcoholic sipper that cleanses the palate between fiery doses of agave.
The world of booze can be mystifying to people that don't work in bars or around alcohol all the time. I hear a lot of assumptions about the industry I'm in that are - much like 90% of what you hear in bars - completely false. Here are a few you've probably heard yourself.
The debate rages on: Should we try to look cool and crack open the Boston shaker or be tidy professionals and use the Hawthorne strainer the way God intended? Be sure to leave your two cents in the comments section.
The traditional garnish for a Pisco Sour is a couple of drops of bitters in the foam, but I've never been particularly impressed with the way these few paltry drops of bitters sat in their little egg-white mattress and didn't play along with the rest of the drink. I envisioned a Pisco Sour with a uniformly-distributed bitters-scorched foam: slightly crisp as the fire burnt the sugars, and slightly warm as the foam insulated the rest of the frosty cocktail from the heat. A pisco creme brulée in a glass!
I get so many visitors looking for tips on how to write a bartending resume that I thought I should finally post a tutorial on how to write your own. Click the headline to read more.
I always love showing up to a party with a gallon jug of pre-mixed margaritas, so I've decided to share my recipe. This margarita recipe is the perfect blend of strong, sweet, and sour. But be warned: this recipe packs a serious punch.
There isn't much I can say about this video that hasn't been said already. If you've read anything I've written about cocktails, you'll understand why this video symbolizes everything wrong with the state of bartending in America today. Watch and learn, but be warned: this one isn't for the feint of heart.
About Me
My name is Jeff Morgenthaler and I'm the head bartender at Clyde Common in Portland, Oregon.
I'm 37, I've been tending bar since 1996 and writing about it since 2004. Mixing drinks has become something of a passion for me in recent years, and I strive to elevate the experience of having a drink from something mundane to something more culinary.
The writing I do here is intended as a work in progress. My recipes are like my opinions: they are constantly being revised and refined as I work them through my mind and my fingers. Comments and participation are encouraged, so please don't feel the need to tread lightly here.
Oh my God this is so awesome I want to die. Andrea from Brooks Nightclub and Whatever had me totally captivated for, like, a whole fifteen seconds - right up until the part where she says that a “Mint Julep is like a Mojito, but with bourbon”
That’s when the Rose’s Lime Juice started happening and I fell backwards in my chair from laughing. Check out this totally awesome video, but whatever you do, don’t ever make this drink.
I’m not even 21 yet and I know that, that is NOT a Mint Julep. What she made was a Mojito with bourbon instead of rum. The Wikipedia article does say it is similar to a Mojito because they both use muddled sugar and mint and take a spritz of seltzer at the end,but that’s about it.
23 Mar 2007 at 1:28 pm 2. Jason!
Words. Fail. Me.
People shouldn’t be allowed to do that. Ever. Not even with cheap bourbon.
I’ll grant you that a Mint Julep and a Mojito are in the same drink family, but that’s very different from saying that a Mint Julep is just a Bourbon Mojito. Very different.
23 Mar 2007 at 1:38 pm 4. Jason!
Pretty much everything on the DrinksTV website seems to be an abomination. The Woodford Reserve Apple Martini is another such unforgettable drink.
Sugar, Rose’s, Sour mix AND SPRITE! It makes my teeth hurt just thinking about it.
24 Mar 2007 at 3:25 pm 6. Scooter
That is vile and disgusting. The drink I mean. She could have at least shaken it longer.
25 Mar 2007 at 8:53 am 7. Vast Majority
Not only was it a poor recipe but there was no flair! Sheesh!… Everyone knows that if you don’t juggle the bottles you just are NOT an accomplished bartender.
Andrea is obviously all about serious bartending, you can tell because she a) uses very precise measurements (”..a little bit, like a teaspoon or so”), and b) has her blouse unbuttoned to her navel.
I’m sure if the people at Woodford saw this, they would get an injuction to stop this video immediately! The horses at the Kentucky Derby could shit a better Mint Julep than this! I can’t even believe I wasted two minutes of my time watching this. I’m sure that I won’t be able to sleep tonight having nightmares of this “cocktail”. Please kill me!
26 Mar 2007 at 10:12 am 12. Dan
I’d also like to mention that DrinksTV is a terrible website which offers bad recipes and techniques.
You don’t say. Here’s another wonderful concoction by our friends at DrinksTV:
Yikes.
26 Mar 2007 at 9:18 pm 14. Lindsey Mitchell
My personal favourite was her ‘muddle’ which was really more like her sharpening her eyeliner - if it had a sound effect it would ‘ehn, ehn, meh.’
c’mon lady - put some elbow grease in it!
29 Mar 2007 at 5:23 pm 15. Smach
I think she forgot the grenadine and chambord. She also forgot to blend it. Mmmmm…
30 Mar 2007 at 10:05 pm 16. John
All the drink videos on the website looks cool (www.drinkstv.com).
Whats with the “competition” section? Looks like Drinkstv has an American Idol for bartending!
Mysterious Commenter, you reek of comment spam, but I like you. Maybe it’s the whisky I had after work tonight.
The Breakfast Martini you linked to doesn’t look that horrible. And, yes, she had the poise and skill of a pro. She’s a Brand Ambassador for Belvedere, she’s got to be talented.
And I actually saw the Competition section of DrinksTV, and I voted. I gave everyone five stars for Personality and Hot Factor, and one star for Cocktail. Great peeps, bad drinks.
31 Mar 2007 at 2:52 pm 18. Scooter
I watched this again, and I now want to make this drink at work EXACTLY her way to see how gross it really is. Next time someone says “surprise me,” THIS is what they’re fuckin’ getting! Wooo Hooo! Yeah…that’ll learn ‘em.
That’s nothing - you should see the drink vids at WatchMojo.com. I never thought it was possible to fuck up a Gin & Tonic, but somehow they did it. And their version of a Mojito makes this one look practically refined.
I wouldn’t mind a Wet Pussy right about now, though.
Chase is my new favorite bartender. I couldn’t understand most of what he was saying, but he’s wearing a sleeveless t-shirt. That means his drinks MUST be good.
09 Aug 2007 at 9:27 pm 24. LT
In memory of my mom, an awesome Kentucky lady:
Derby Day Mint Julep
1 10 oz. sterling silver Julep Cup (chilled)
2 cubes of ice
2 oz. Kentucky Bourbon (dads choice)
a sprig of mint (for the essence)
“Hey, where’s the sugar?. Who cares, enjoy your bourbon and shut up.” :)
to be honest i do not wanna watch this video, i might forget my own standards LOL ewwww they su*****ks
31 Aug 2007 at 5:26 pm 26. Ali
Its not Brooks, its Bricks nightclub Haahaha and I know the head bartender there I just text him right now to tell him how retarded his staff is! But knowing Miami standards, all you need is a pair of tits to get behind a bar!
31 Aug 2007 at 5:34 pm 27. Anonymous
I just looked through those videos from DrunkTV…thats just poor representation!!! There ARE quality bartenders in South Florida, I’m going back next month and I’m looking these guys up to point that out to them.
I no longer doubt the existence of the human soul because I just felt mine shrivel and die. I thought that by reading the entry and comments, I’d be prepared. No such luck. I yelled and startled my pet rabbits when she plopped in the limes.
My rabbits are MAD, cruddy drink-makin’ lady! Live with THAT!
Hey, Kat, at least she didn’t say, “It’s similar to rabbit stew, only it has rum in place of onions.”
Could’ve been worse, right?
28 Oct 2007 at 5:21 pm 30. Shelby needs her juice!!!
I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit!!
03 Nov 2007 at 2:19 am 31. kikithewondermonkey
i thought that i had something to say but i find myself speachless.
27 Nov 2007 at 10:53 pm 32. arthur
wow,
i am gobsmacked.
remind me never to drop into that bar for a cocktail,might be safer to order a bottled beer.if those guys spent as much time learning drinks than looking hot,then they can tend bar.ive had bar backs that i have worked with have better cocktail knowledge.
maybe the cleavage and sleeveless shirt was a distraction for people to not pay attention at how their drinks are being made.
thanks for the much needed giggle
I stumbled on your site a couple months ago and enjoy stopping by from time to time. Heres my Mint Julep story: I currently tend at a bar called CRU Martini Bar in Mandeville, LA but before that managed a restaurant Annadeles Plantation(annadeles.com). A couple years ago. The movie, Dreamer starring Kurt Russel and Dakota Fanning was filming in our area. Kurt Russel and a couple others came in for dinner one night. Everthing went well and they thoughrouly enoyed themselves. Not until after they left did the waitress inform me that his first drink request had been a Mint Julep and we had been completely out of fresh mint. (Something we never really had on hand.) Well, a week later they came back! This time I sent one of the backwaiters to the store for some mint and offered Mr. Russel one on the house. He enjoyed the drink and the experience at the restaurant so much he actually had us cater the movies wrap party for them.
I just re-watched the video (I did post it almost a year ago, after all) and you’re right! It’s very easy to miss, as she only uses it for about a half second.
If any of you haven’t seen the video in a while, I do recommend watching it again for the first time. Yeeesh.
Since we started producing The Cocktail Spirit with Robert Hess I constantly search the web trying to find our competition. DrinksTV were early on the scene and always laughable. We are shooting more episodes of our show this weekend. Included is the Mint Julep and there will be no Rose’s or Sprite!
Asides from a litany of sins, she also holds the shaker the wrong way - whenever I happen to see that I duck. Just another reason to stay well away…
14 May 2008 at 7:21 am 49. Ian
What was that thing? Not a mint julep by any stretch of the imagination.
Wow.
23 May 2008 at 4:11 am 50. Steve (Plymouth, UK)
I actually laughed out loud watching that at my desk at work (should have been do something else!) What’s with the Bonsai dead palm tree at the end? It looked altogether hideous, I would never, COULD never, serve something that looked so unappetising.
I can’t believe that people put this rubbish out for public consumption and cause the majority of people to think good bartenders are idiots for not knowing how to make ‘proper’ drinks; you know excessively sweet ones with tons of ingredients.
Simple is best. Noilly Prat, Plymouth Navy Strength, a feint lemon oil ’spray’ and 2 olives will suit me everytime.
23 May 2008 at 4:16 am 51. Steve (Plymouth, UK)
Sorry! I should have introduced myself I’m Steve, Naval Architect by day and cocktail bartender at ‘Lavish’ by night. Bartending for me was a student job that I enjoyed so much that it’s become my hobby!
I now run a small cocktail bar in nightclub ‘Lavish’, I shall use that clip to do exactly as you suggest, show my staff how NOT to make a Mint Julep!
Steve, welcome to the website, and thanks for contributing!
13 Jun 2008 at 9:17 am 53. Ryan Clayton
im 18 and have been bartending for less than a year and i cannot believe this woman. lime juice …
mint juleps are very nice drinks , especially if using a good quality bourbon such as woodford. but this girl has just ruined it
16 Jun 2008 at 9:44 pm 54. Chris
Holy mother of God that was terrible. Not only was her recipe completely screwed (even if she’d substituted Bacardi to make a mojito it would’ve been wrong) but her technique was awful too. Remember kids, always use the wrong end of the muddler to just sort of poke at the limes and mint to make sure they’re dead. And be sure to use a two-second cerebral-palsey shake to mix it all up after you’ve topped it off with SPRITE. A nice pair of tits is no substitute for knowing what you’re doing.
What with all that liquid and the pulpy mass of decomposing plant life floating around in there, I think that drink would be better referred to as a “Swamp Julep.”
This is Andrea, with Bricks Nightclub? Just want you to know, I really do know how to make a GREAT mint julep, but DrinksTV’s last paycheck to me kind of bounced, and my boss was being a douche lately, so when they asked me to do the mint julep for a webisode? This is what I made to get even.
I can’t believe they actually posted it! And now I’m like totally embarrassed I dragged Woodford Reserve down, too. Oopsies.
Okay, in fact this is not Andrea, but I like to think that’s what’s going on this video, because I hate thinking that any woman can be so willfully ignorant, or that anyone could come up with this drink for any reason other than revenge.
I am an atheist and I just called the pope on my cellie to ask if he might spare a f-cking exorcist for me. I cannot believe the liquid genocide I have just witnessed.
please please…..puleeeeze tell me this girl is pregnant from one of her barflies that stupidly encouraged her to keep bartending.
Kharma is a great scorekeeper. I hope a woodford reserve ninja jumps out of the bourbon bushes and clubs her to death with some muddler numbchucks (and shows her how to use them properly as well)
I needed a good laugh. I initially was crying over the waste of good bourbon. Then once it got to the “oh, and don’t forget the Sprite!” I lost it. And the bartending Ox with the Wet Pussy. My god, that is why I left Florida. I don’t need to see armpit hair when you’re making my drink.
This video is like an Evan Williams single barrel or a bottle of A.H. Hirsch: One can’t help but revisit it from time to time, tempted always by the knowledge that every sip allows the manifold subtleties of the experience to reveal themselves anew.
For instance, this time around, I am especially appreciating the way Andrea says, “…mix that bad boy up!”
The next time I yield to this video’s irresistible siren song, it may be the soulful-yet-unchallenging blues-guitar being plucked in the background, or perhaps it will be Andrea’s habit of referring to everything with possessive pronouns:
“Now you’re gonna take your sour mix, and you’re also gonna take your Woodford Reserve,”
“…pour it into your highball,”
and of course,
“Don’t forget to add your Sprite!”
Ahhhh….
So many nuances to savor, so little time.
04 Dec 2008 at 1:46 am 63. Danny
Oh god………….
05 Dec 2008 at 6:31 pm 64. Jaime
Jeffrey,
Brilliant find.
Fantastic example of the worst in bar tending. The sad thing is we have all seen a confident young idiot like this behind the bar.
When you do encounter this type of bartender don’t be pissed at the management for putting someone like this behind the bar–just take advantage of the situation. I’ve done it and so have my bar tending friends. Pick a drink,say-a Black Russian-ask her how much it costs then tell her what glass you prefer it in-say-a chimmney or pint glass. Tell her to grab the premium vodka and the Kahula.
Just say,
“Now start pouring the vodka, ok stop, now fill it up with Kahula. Great.Good job. Wow that deserves a good tip.”
She will not know.
05 Dec 2008 at 9:20 pm 65. Bob
Nice site, Mr. Morgenthaler.
What can I say that hasn’t been said above? What an abomination!
…and a margarita is made with tequila and roses lime, built over ice in a poco grande and served with a salt shaker on the side…
“Excuse me while I get my coat.”
Wow. I read the recipe first, so
I shoulda been prepared, but good gravy that was excruciating! I think I my have thrown up a little in my mouth.
08 Jan 2009 at 9:31 pm 69. Grimmy
WTF!!!! That goes into the history books.Did no one notice she kept the boston glass on the bottom when shaken.Where I’m from I fire staff for doing that basic shit.Can’t believe tits & ass still get you a good job these days!!!!
Grimmy. Brisbane AUS
22 Jan 2009 at 6:10 am 70. Ben
Fuckin’ awesome. Just rad. I really enjoyed this video. I needed the laugh.
Bar managers of the world, this is what happens when you hire tits and ass over experience and skill: a slow moron who can’t use a shaker properly and wastes your precious liquor on drinks so shitty they literally makes dozens of people laugh.
Thanks Jeff. Badass site. I tend bar in Dubai right now but I went to school in Eugene.
…You think thay hired her to pour drinks I`ll put her to work the bar,,What about the 2nd video ,, do you want this guy working your bar
09 Mar 2009 at 5:14 pm 72. Churba
I’m not going to say anything about this Andrea woman as a person, as I know nothing about her, but I’ll join mob here, and say what I thought was technically right and wrong here.
- A Mint Julep is similar to a Mojito, this is true. However, The recipe she gives is practically a Mojito with Bourbon, as she stated, which is not a Mint Julep - It’s a Mojito with Bourbon substituted. You can put two more wheels on a motorbike, but that doesn’t make it a car.
- The recipe she states is very imprecise, however, the recipe is given in measurements in the subtitles. Only a half point off there.
- I am not of the belief that she’s using her muddle upside down. It looks to me as if she’s using a baseball bat style muddler, complete with the nub on the top, and she’s holding it by the narrow, nubbed end.
- Her muddling was weak and brief. A little more effort would not go astray.
- Credit for not scooping her ice with the glass.
- Her shaking was the most limp-wristed, pissweak shaking I’ve ever seen. She shook it like she was mixing nitroglycerin instead of a butchered Mojito. Go on, ma’am, give it some mongrel, It won’t hurt you.
Over all commentary on DrinksTV -
They do have some good ideas, and the people they have in their videos do seem to have at least a decent idea what they are doing, but for the most part, they all have some terrible technique going on, and many of their recipes are, while not terrible, certainly not something I’d be serving in that form to a customer.
23 Mar 2009 at 1:05 pm 73. Nicole
AAAAhahahahahaha this is absolutely hysterical! It really is amazing what people will do to make a few bucks. I also read the recipe before watching the video and it made me squirm just thinking about it, especially putting all of that together with Woodford. This definately put a smile on my face so i guess not all is lost. Yikes
There’s got to be some sort of product-placement-kickback deal here. I can’t see DrinksTV specifically specifying that it should be a Woodford Reserve Mojito Monstrosity unless Woodford was in some way compensating them for it.
I wonder if the Woodford people feel they got their money’s worth?
Wait…
Maybe it’s a protection racket:
Somebody from DrinksTV shows up at the Woodford distillery and says, “You know, it’d be a real shame if we had to shoot a video on how to make a Woodford Reserve Lawn-Guyland Iced Tea!”
02 Apr 2009 at 3:11 pm 75. Mike Robertson
Sad but true that you see way too many owners or bar managers hire for looks instead of talent. A guest at the bar I was working years ago told me his theory on holding the muddler one way or the other. He insisted that inexperienced female heterosexual and gay male bartenders hold it with the “head” up and that heterosexual male and gay female bartenders hold it with the head down. It has been years since he told me that and 9 times out of 10 he is correct. The gay male and straight female will treat the muddler gently and the gay female will punish the limes and mint. Sorry if it’s not PC but it’s funny as hell.
22 Apr 2009 at 1:40 pm 76. Eva Tweed
I suddenly feel so much better about my bartending skills!
25 Apr 2009 at 5:27 am 77. Chris
That was the most horrible thing I have ever seen. This is why I have grown to despise the “hot chick” bartending trend. So what if their drinks suck? At least their tits are hanging out and they talk to lonely losers for the whole 20 seconds it takes to make an atrocity like this. After all, that’s what truly counts in this biz.
30 Apr 2009 at 7:40 pm 78. Laurie
“Mint Julep is like a Mojito, but with bourbon…”
Famous last words of every server I’ve ever ordered from on a cruise ship. Funny thing is, one ship we sail on has a themed nightclub where the Mint Julep is a featured drink. As soon as you leave that lounge, though, nobody can make one. If I get another Mint Julep with lime in it I’m going to lose it. I’m carrying the recipe with me on my next cruise.
03 May 2009 at 4:59 pm 79. Kyle
AHHHHHHHHHH.
Wow. So wrong.
05 Jun 2009 at 9:30 am 80. Todd Appel
That is one of the funniest things I have ever seen!…it is real serious…including the bursting cleavage…That is why it is so funny
If ever there was an all en capsuling pinnacle and acme for stupid drink “making” by dumb chicks with nice tits…that is it!
There is the opposite with the guy version too…understood
I tink they meant
The Woodford Reserve Spring Break Cabo Diabo Mint Julep!
I absolutely hate it when someone sends me a box full of sex toys in the mail. Sure, it might sound like fun to some of you (you know who you are), but receiving a big box of free sex is much more trouble than it’s worth. Believe me. So I get a [...]
23 Mar 2007 at 1:12 pm 1. Mark Fleser
I’m not even 21 yet and I know that, that is NOT a Mint Julep. What she made was a Mojito with bourbon instead of rum. The Wikipedia article does say it is similar to a Mojito because they both use muddled sugar and mint and take a spritz of seltzer at the end,but that’s about it.
23 Mar 2007 at 1:28 pm 2. Jason!
Words. Fail. Me.
People shouldn’t be allowed to do that. Ever. Not even with cheap bourbon.
23 Mar 2007 at 1:30 pm 3. Jeffrey
I’ll grant you that a Mint Julep and a Mojito are in the same drink family, but that’s very different from saying that a Mint Julep is just a Bourbon Mojito. Very different.
23 Mar 2007 at 1:38 pm 4. Jason!
Pretty much everything on the DrinksTV website seems to be an abomination. The Woodford Reserve Apple Martini is another such unforgettable drink.
23 Mar 2007 at 5:47 pm 5. jimmy
Wow!
Sugar, Rose’s, Sour mix AND SPRITE! It makes my teeth hurt just thinking about it.
24 Mar 2007 at 3:25 pm 6. Scooter
That is vile and disgusting. The drink I mean. She could have at least shaken it longer.
25 Mar 2007 at 8:53 am 7. Vast Majority
Not only was it a poor recipe but there was no flair! Sheesh!… Everyone knows that if you don’t juggle the bottles you just are NOT an accomplished bartender.
25 Mar 2007 at 11:01 am 8. MrBaliHai
Andrea is obviously all about serious bartending, you can tell because she a) uses very precise measurements (”..a little bit, like a teaspoon or so”), and b) has her blouse unbuttoned to her navel.
25 Mar 2007 at 6:40 pm 9. RickJamesBitch
Um. this is also no way to make a mojito!
25 Mar 2007 at 7:04 pm 10. Dan
Oh. My. God.
Terrible, just terrible.
26 Mar 2007 at 4:21 am 11. Sean Bigley
I’m sure if the people at Woodford saw this, they would get an injuction to stop this video immediately! The horses at the Kentucky Derby could shit a better Mint Julep than this! I can’t even believe I wasted two minutes of my time watching this. I’m sure that I won’t be able to sleep tonight having nightmares of this “cocktail”. Please kill me!
26 Mar 2007 at 10:12 am 12. Dan
I’d also like to mention that DrinksTV is a terrible website which offers bad recipes and techniques.
26 Mar 2007 at 2:39 pm 13. Jeffrey
Dan
You don’t say. Here’s another wonderful concoction by our friends at DrinksTV:
Yikes.
26 Mar 2007 at 9:18 pm 14. Lindsey Mitchell
My personal favourite was her ‘muddle’ which was really more like her sharpening her eyeliner - if it had a sound effect it would ‘ehn, ehn, meh.’
c’mon lady - put some elbow grease in it!
29 Mar 2007 at 5:23 pm 15. Smach
I think she forgot the grenadine and chambord. She also forgot to blend it. Mmmmm…
30 Mar 2007 at 10:05 pm 16. John
All the drink videos on the website looks cool (www.drinkstv.com).
Whats with the “competition” section? Looks like Drinkstv has an American Idol for bartending!
this one was done by a pro
http://www.drinkstv.com/channelvodka.aspx
31 Mar 2007 at 2:31 am 17. Jeffrey
Mysterious Commenter, you reek of comment spam, but I like you. Maybe it’s the whisky I had after work tonight.
The Breakfast Martini you linked to doesn’t look that horrible. And, yes, she had the poise and skill of a pro. She’s a Brand Ambassador for Belvedere, she’s got to be talented.
And I actually saw the Competition section of DrinksTV, and I voted. I gave everyone five stars for Personality and Hot Factor, and one star for Cocktail. Great peeps, bad drinks.
31 Mar 2007 at 2:52 pm 18. Scooter
I watched this again, and I now want to make this drink at work EXACTLY her way to see how gross it really is. Next time someone says “surprise me,” THIS is what they’re fuckin’ getting! Wooo Hooo! Yeah…that’ll learn ‘em.
14 Apr 2007 at 11:26 pm 19. Darryl
That’s nothing - you should see the drink vids at WatchMojo.com. I never thought it was possible to fuck up a Gin & Tonic, but somehow they did it. And their version of a Mojito makes this one look practically refined.
I wouldn’t mind a Wet Pussy right about now, though.
04 May 2007 at 7:58 am 20. Michael
oh
my
God
16 May 2007 at 2:36 pm 21. Anonymous
The real star of this video: cleavage.
01 Jun 2007 at 4:42 pm 22. Kevin
You are not taking into account that Andrea has nice tits.
And the way she over-enunciates “Mint Julep”.
Hot.
05 Jul 2007 at 11:31 am 23. Marleigh
Chase is my new favorite bartender. I couldn’t understand most of what he was saying, but he’s wearing a sleeveless t-shirt. That means his drinks MUST be good.
09 Aug 2007 at 9:27 pm 24. LT
In memory of my mom, an awesome Kentucky lady:
Derby Day Mint Julep
1 10 oz. sterling silver Julep Cup (chilled)
2 cubes of ice
2 oz. Kentucky Bourbon (dads choice)
a sprig of mint (for the essence)
“Hey, where’s the sugar?. Who cares, enjoy your bourbon and shut up.” :)
17 Aug 2007 at 1:16 pm 25. mru
to be honest i do not wanna watch this video, i might forget my own standards LOL ewwww they su*****ks
31 Aug 2007 at 5:26 pm 26. Ali
Its not Brooks, its Bricks nightclub Haahaha and I know the head bartender there I just text him right now to tell him how retarded his staff is! But knowing Miami standards, all you need is a pair of tits to get behind a bar!
31 Aug 2007 at 5:34 pm 27. Anonymous
I just looked through those videos from DrunkTV…thats just poor representation!!! There ARE quality bartenders in South Florida, I’m going back next month and I’m looking these guys up to point that out to them.
13 Sep 2007 at 11:59 pm 28. Kat
Well for the love of Baal…
I no longer doubt the existence of the human soul because I just felt mine shrivel and die. I thought that by reading the entry and comments, I’d be prepared. No such luck. I yelled and startled my pet rabbits when she plopped in the limes.
My rabbits are MAD, cruddy drink-makin’ lady! Live with THAT!
14 Sep 2007 at 12:47 am 29. Jeffrey
Hey, Kat, at least she didn’t say, “It’s similar to rabbit stew, only it has rum in place of onions.”
Could’ve been worse, right?
28 Oct 2007 at 5:21 pm 30. Shelby needs her juice!!!
I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit!!
03 Nov 2007 at 2:19 am 31. kikithewondermonkey
i thought that i had something to say but i find myself speachless.
27 Nov 2007 at 10:53 pm 32. arthur
wow,
i am gobsmacked.
remind me never to drop into that bar for a cocktail,might be safer to order a bottled beer.if those guys spent as much time learning drinks than looking hot,then they can tend bar.ive had bar backs that i have worked with have better cocktail knowledge.
maybe the cleavage and sleeveless shirt was a distraction for people to not pay attention at how their drinks are being made.
thanks for the much needed giggle
01 Dec 2007 at 11:17 pm 33. Shawn
Oh. My. God. This video makes a good old Kentucky guy like me cringe. I’ve had better juleps at sorority parties.
Where to begin? Perhaps with the limes? The Rose’s? The sour mix? The
Sprite?
I think that she needs one more step to the recipe, right after the mint sprig…toss the whole thing down the drain before anyone sees you.
06 Dec 2007 at 1:24 pm 34. Evan
I would laugh about this, but I’m too busy crying. Poor Woodford, what has she done to you?!
17 Dec 2007 at 11:16 pm 35. Christine
As a Kentuckian, I’m offended.
21 Dec 2007 at 1:42 am 36. Tom G
Oh goodness gracious… what a train wreak….
29 Dec 2007 at 8:41 am 37. Brad
Hey Jeffrey,
I stumbled on your site a couple months ago and enjoy stopping by from time to time. Heres my Mint Julep story: I currently tend at a bar called CRU Martini Bar in Mandeville, LA but before that managed a restaurant Annadeles Plantation(annadeles.com). A couple years ago. The movie, Dreamer starring Kurt Russel and Dakota Fanning was filming in our area. Kurt Russel and a couple others came in for dinner one night. Everthing went well and they thoughrouly enoyed themselves. Not until after they left did the waitress inform me that his first drink request had been a Mint Julep and we had been completely out of fresh mint. (Something we never really had on hand.) Well, a week later they came back! This time I sent one of the backwaiters to the store for some mint and offered Mr. Russel one on the house. He enjoyed the drink and the experience at the restaurant so much he actually had us cater the movies wrap party for them.
02 Jan 2008 at 1:35 pm 38. Jeffrey Morgenthaler
Brad
That’s a great story, nice work.
25 Jan 2008 at 4:48 am 39. Temptin
Ok all you experts!
I can’t believe with everything else, no one noticed that she is holding the muddle upside down!
The really sad part is she seems so confidant that what she is doing in right.
25 Jan 2008 at 12:35 pm 40. Jeffrey Morgenthaler
I just re-watched the video (I did post it almost a year ago, after all) and you’re right! It’s very easy to miss, as she only uses it for about a half second.
If any of you haven’t seen the video in a while, I do recommend watching it again for the first time. Yeeesh.
29 Jan 2008 at 3:08 pm 41. Colin Kimball
Since we started producing The Cocktail Spirit with Robert Hess I constantly search the web trying to find our competition. DrinksTV were early on the scene and always laughable. We are shooting more episodes of our show this weekend. Included is the Mint Julep and there will be no Rose’s or Sprite!
Here’s to fresh!
30 Jan 2008 at 1:27 am 42. Jeffrey Morgenthaler
Amen, Colin. If any of you reading this haven’t checked out The Cocktail Spirit with Robert Hess yet, do yourself a favor and head on over.
I’m looking forward to seeing the Mint Julep episode, Colin, and as you said, “Here’s to fresh!”
27 Feb 2008 at 11:46 pm 43. Chris
I must say, as someone born below the Mason Dixon line, that video hurt on a visceral level. And I bet she makes a really crappy Mojito as well.
Jeffrey, nice website by the way!
04 Mar 2008 at 9:20 am 44. Orlando (machete)
wow.
limes………
17 Apr 2008 at 12:50 am 45. bdkollker
All I can say is “OH MY GOODNESS!!”
27 Apr 2008 at 8:21 am 46. Peter
The winner!
05 May 2008 at 12:17 pm 47. Tiare
The worst i`ve ever seen..
05 May 2008 at 3:01 pm 48. Phil
Asides from a litany of sins, she also holds the shaker the wrong way - whenever I happen to see that I duck. Just another reason to stay well away…
14 May 2008 at 7:21 am 49. Ian
What was that thing? Not a mint julep by any stretch of the imagination.
Wow.
23 May 2008 at 4:11 am 50. Steve (Plymouth, UK)
I actually laughed out loud watching that at my desk at work (should have been do something else!) What’s with the Bonsai dead palm tree at the end? It looked altogether hideous, I would never, COULD never, serve something that looked so unappetising.
I can’t believe that people put this rubbish out for public consumption and cause the majority of people to think good bartenders are idiots for not knowing how to make ‘proper’ drinks; you know excessively sweet ones with tons of ingredients.
Simple is best. Noilly Prat, Plymouth Navy Strength, a feint lemon oil ’spray’ and 2 olives will suit me everytime.
23 May 2008 at 4:16 am 51. Steve (Plymouth, UK)
Sorry! I should have introduced myself I’m Steve, Naval Architect by day and cocktail bartender at ‘Lavish’ by night. Bartending for me was a student job that I enjoyed so much that it’s become my hobby!
I now run a small cocktail bar in nightclub ‘Lavish’, I shall use that clip to do exactly as you suggest, show my staff how NOT to make a Mint Julep!
26 May 2008 at 1:06 pm 52. Jeffrey Morgenthaler
Steve, welcome to the website, and thanks for contributing!
13 Jun 2008 at 9:17 am 53. Ryan Clayton
im 18 and have been bartending for less than a year and i cannot believe this woman. lime juice …
mint juleps are very nice drinks , especially if using a good quality bourbon such as woodford. but this girl has just ruined it
16 Jun 2008 at 9:44 pm 54. Chris
Holy mother of God that was terrible. Not only was her recipe completely screwed (even if she’d substituted Bacardi to make a mojito it would’ve been wrong) but her technique was awful too. Remember kids, always use the wrong end of the muddler to just sort of poke at the limes and mint to make sure they’re dead. And be sure to use a two-second cerebral-palsey shake to mix it all up after you’ve topped it off with SPRITE. A nice pair of tits is no substitute for knowing what you’re doing.
05 Jul 2008 at 5:43 am 55. Pål Hatlem (Norway)
Oooooh nooooo.. thats a “bad boy” indeed
29 Jul 2008 at 11:40 am 56. Brendan P. Bartholomew
What with all that liquid and the pulpy mass of decomposing plant life floating around in there, I think that drink would be better referred to as a “Swamp Julep.”
12 Aug 2008 at 2:15 pm 57. Eli C
Lime? Rose’s? Powdered sugar? Canned.. anything? SPRITE?!?
Not in my pewter cup, thank you.
I’ll just have a water.. no, make it two so I can throw one at whoever wrote this recipe.
03 Oct 2008 at 6:33 am 58. Edward Hamilton
If you think that was bad, imagine the competition that didn’t make the cut on the audition.
26 Oct 2008 at 10:45 pm 59. Andrea B.
Hi Guys,
This is Andrea, with Bricks Nightclub? Just want you to know, I really do know how to make a GREAT mint julep, but DrinksTV’s last paycheck to me kind of bounced, and my boss was being a douche lately, so when they asked me to do the mint julep for a webisode? This is what I made to get even.
I can’t believe they actually posted it! And now I’m like totally embarrassed I dragged Woodford Reserve down, too. Oopsies.
Okay, in fact this is not Andrea, but I like to think that’s what’s going on this video, because I hate thinking that any woman can be so willfully ignorant, or that anyone could come up with this drink for any reason other than revenge.
-Bob C.
27 Oct 2008 at 9:26 pm 60. MA
I am an atheist and I just called the pope on my cellie to ask if he might spare a f-cking exorcist for me. I cannot believe the liquid genocide I have just witnessed.
please please…..puleeeeze tell me this girl is pregnant from one of her barflies that stupidly encouraged her to keep bartending.
Kharma is a great scorekeeper. I hope a woodford reserve ninja jumps out of the bourbon bushes and clubs her to death with some muddler numbchucks (and shows her how to use them properly as well)
I must.. go on…(sniff)
13 Nov 2008 at 5:10 pm 61. Kimberly Patton-Bragg
I needed a good laugh. I initially was crying over the waste of good bourbon. Then once it got to the “oh, and don’t forget the Sprite!” I lost it. And the bartending Ox with the Wet Pussy. My god, that is why I left Florida. I don’t need to see armpit hair when you’re making my drink.
13 Nov 2008 at 8:32 pm 62. Brendan P. Bartholomew
This video is like an Evan Williams single barrel or a bottle of A.H. Hirsch: One can’t help but revisit it from time to time, tempted always by the knowledge that every sip allows the manifold subtleties of the experience to reveal themselves anew.
For instance, this time around, I am especially appreciating the way Andrea says, “…mix that bad boy up!”
The next time I yield to this video’s irresistible siren song, it may be the soulful-yet-unchallenging blues-guitar being plucked in the background, or perhaps it will be Andrea’s habit of referring to everything with possessive pronouns:
“Now you’re gonna take your sour mix, and you’re also gonna take your Woodford Reserve,”
“…pour it into your highball,”
and of course,
“Don’t forget to add your Sprite!”
Ahhhh….
So many nuances to savor, so little time.
04 Dec 2008 at 1:46 am 63. Danny
Oh god………….
05 Dec 2008 at 6:31 pm 64. Jaime
Jeffrey,
Brilliant find.
Fantastic example of the worst in bar tending. The sad thing is we have all seen a confident young idiot like this behind the bar.
When you do encounter this type of bartender don’t be pissed at the management for putting someone like this behind the bar–just take advantage of the situation. I’ve done it and so have my bar tending friends. Pick a drink,say-a Black Russian-ask her how much it costs then tell her what glass you prefer it in-say-a chimmney or pint glass. Tell her to grab the premium vodka and the Kahula.
Just say,
“Now start pouring the vodka, ok stop, now fill it up with Kahula. Great.Good job. Wow that deserves a good tip.”
She will not know.
05 Dec 2008 at 9:20 pm 65. Bob
Nice site, Mr. Morgenthaler.
What can I say that hasn’t been said above? What an abomination!
I’m NOT from Kentucky and I’m offended.
Some kind of Bricks Bimbo Rickey?
16 Dec 2008 at 4:59 pm 66. Alex
oh god no
all that beautiful bourbon… wasted…
*cries*
17 Dec 2008 at 2:48 am 67. Merlin Griffiths
…and a margarita is made with tequila and roses lime, built over ice in a poco grande and served with a salt shaker on the side…
“Excuse me while I get my coat.”
17 Dec 2008 at 3:31 am 68. Phill
Wow. I read the recipe first, so
I shoulda been prepared, but good gravy that was excruciating! I think I my have thrown up a little in my mouth.
08 Jan 2009 at 9:31 pm 69. Grimmy
WTF!!!! That goes into the history books.Did no one notice she kept the boston glass on the bottom when shaken.Where I’m from I fire staff for doing that basic shit.Can’t believe tits & ass still get you a good job these days!!!!
Grimmy. Brisbane AUS
22 Jan 2009 at 6:10 am 70. Ben
Fuckin’ awesome. Just rad. I really enjoyed this video. I needed the laugh.
Bar managers of the world, this is what happens when you hire tits and ass over experience and skill: a slow moron who can’t use a shaker properly and wastes your precious liquor on drinks so shitty they literally makes dozens of people laugh.
Thanks Jeff. Badass site. I tend bar in Dubai right now but I went to school in Eugene.
05 Feb 2009 at 12:29 am 71. two,,
…You think thay hired her to pour drinks I`ll put her to work the bar,,What about the 2nd video ,, do you want this guy working your bar
09 Mar 2009 at 5:14 pm 72. Churba
I’m not going to say anything about this Andrea woman as a person, as I know nothing about her, but I’ll join mob here, and say what I thought was technically right and wrong here.
- A Mint Julep is similar to a Mojito, this is true. However, The recipe she gives is practically a Mojito with Bourbon, as she stated, which is not a Mint Julep - It’s a Mojito with Bourbon substituted. You can put two more wheels on a motorbike, but that doesn’t make it a car.
- The recipe she states is very imprecise, however, the recipe is given in measurements in the subtitles. Only a half point off there.
- I am not of the belief that she’s using her muddle upside down. It looks to me as if she’s using a baseball bat style muddler, complete with the nub on the top, and she’s holding it by the narrow, nubbed end.
- Her muddling was weak and brief. A little more effort would not go astray.
- Credit for not scooping her ice with the glass.
- Her shaking was the most limp-wristed, pissweak shaking I’ve ever seen. She shook it like she was mixing nitroglycerin instead of a butchered Mojito. Go on, ma’am, give it some mongrel, It won’t hurt you.
Over all commentary on DrinksTV -
They do have some good ideas, and the people they have in their videos do seem to have at least a decent idea what they are doing, but for the most part, they all have some terrible technique going on, and many of their recipes are, while not terrible, certainly not something I’d be serving in that form to a customer.
23 Mar 2009 at 1:05 pm 73. Nicole
AAAAhahahahahaha this is absolutely hysterical! It really is amazing what people will do to make a few bucks. I also read the recipe before watching the video and it made me squirm just thinking about it, especially putting all of that together with Woodford. This definately put a smile on my face so i guess not all is lost. Yikes
23 Mar 2009 at 2:21 pm 74. Brendan P. Bartholomew
There’s got to be some sort of product-placement-kickback deal here. I can’t see DrinksTV specifically specifying that it should be a Woodford Reserve Mojito Monstrosity unless Woodford was in some way compensating them for it.
I wonder if the Woodford people feel they got their money’s worth?
Wait…
Maybe it’s a protection racket:
Somebody from DrinksTV shows up at the Woodford distillery and says, “You know, it’d be a real shame if we had to shoot a video on how to make a Woodford Reserve Lawn-Guyland Iced Tea!”
02 Apr 2009 at 3:11 pm 75. Mike Robertson
Sad but true that you see way too many owners or bar managers hire for looks instead of talent. A guest at the bar I was working years ago told me his theory on holding the muddler one way or the other. He insisted that inexperienced female heterosexual and gay male bartenders hold it with the “head” up and that heterosexual male and gay female bartenders hold it with the head down. It has been years since he told me that and 9 times out of 10 he is correct. The gay male and straight female will treat the muddler gently and the gay female will punish the limes and mint. Sorry if it’s not PC but it’s funny as hell.
22 Apr 2009 at 1:40 pm 76. Eva Tweed
I suddenly feel so much better about my bartending skills!
25 Apr 2009 at 5:27 am 77. Chris
That was the most horrible thing I have ever seen. This is why I have grown to despise the “hot chick” bartending trend. So what if their drinks suck? At least their tits are hanging out and they talk to lonely losers for the whole 20 seconds it takes to make an atrocity like this. After all, that’s what truly counts in this biz.
30 Apr 2009 at 7:40 pm 78. Laurie
“Mint Julep is like a Mojito, but with bourbon…”
Famous last words of every server I’ve ever ordered from on a cruise ship. Funny thing is, one ship we sail on has a themed nightclub where the Mint Julep is a featured drink. As soon as you leave that lounge, though, nobody can make one. If I get another Mint Julep with lime in it I’m going to lose it. I’m carrying the recipe with me on my next cruise.
03 May 2009 at 4:59 pm 79. Kyle
AHHHHHHHHHH.
Wow. So wrong.
05 Jun 2009 at 9:30 am 80. Todd Appel
That is one of the funniest things I have ever seen!…it is real serious…including the bursting cleavage…That is why it is so funny
If ever there was an all en capsuling pinnacle and acme for stupid drink “making” by dumb chicks with nice tits…that is it!
There is the opposite with the guy version too…understood
I tink they meant
The Woodford Reserve Spring Break Cabo Diabo Mint Julep!